The offended and the offensive

These are sensitive times. I get lots of reminders on different ways to offend others unintentionally.

We published a submitted photo of a local baseball team recently, printed at the conclusion of their summer season. We got all the names right (I think) and gave credit to the photographer. But, in an effort to attract readership and avoid a dull repetition of words introducing yet another list of names, we chose a different headline. We printed “Gallatin (team name) takes a knee” because the front row of boys literally was on their knees.

Evidently, some read a subliminal message into this choice of words. Suddenly we were confronted with objections from a couple of our readers, about professional athletes protesting during the playing of the national anthem and how maybe we were encouraging our youth to embrace such disrespect.

Really?

Fortunately, our discussion and disagreement was civil and enlightening. Maybe we were insensitive by unintentionally bringing a national debate into a local circumstance, which could have been avoided simply by a totally different choice of words. I took no offense being confronted, especially as I realized the sincerity in the way the offense was expressed. I found myself explaining the headline, how I have personally participated in organized competitive sports as a youth in summer leagues, in school, in varsity competitions and on the collegiate level. Every coach I ever had used the term “Take a knee” to mean “take a break” with an implied “You’d better listen up or else.”

Athletes are told to take a knee (to rest) whenever a player gets injured. Coaches regularly reward players, signaling the end of a hard practice or a long season with rest, calling players to huddle together by taking a knee before hitting the showers or capping a season’s worth of time spent together.

You can read about headline offense by reading the article in this issue about our regional jail. According to board minutes, some readers evidently construed the headline “Jail will begin soliciting for inmates” to mean authorities were seeking prostitutes for inmates. Yes, there’s logic to the misunderstanding and a better choice of words might have sidestepped any confusion. But our jail soliciting for prostitutes …really?

At other times, an unintentional offense threatens serious consequence.

For instance, this past week we received overnight mail from a law firm accusing us of copyright infringement. This involves a photograph used in an advertisement which we did not create, authorized upon request of the advertiser, and printed (since no copyright mark was evident). Their offense came packaged with a threatening price tag — despite our position which we hope and believe we can easily defend.

On the other hand, I get offended, too. Curse words are intentionally crude, but I take offense above that threshold whenever I hear a grandchild blurt out “Turd!” or “Shut up!” or “You’re dumb!” … which only mimics what they regularly hear watching cartoons. I’m no fan of rude, crude, or shock comedy on any level.

Sunday, while driving to morning worship, I was offended by my wife’s cell phone when it sounded off. It was an unsolicited Google alert informing us that our church was less than four minutes away — as if we didn’t know. Liz wasn’t even using the phone! How can it be that something knows where we’re heading before we even acknowledge to anyone else where we’re going?

And, talk about the offensive, I’m really offended by President Trump. I can’t imagine how offensive it must be to those sworn to serve, hearing a U.S. President standing on foreign soil shamelessly embrace and intentionally choose a Soviet adversary over the work, advice, and efforts of those sworn to serve our country.

You can be offensive and offended on so many levels of life these days.

In times past I have literally watched people go across the street to avoid meeting me without knowing how I offended. I hope I don’t offend you when I shrug that off and mumble something about it just being part of the job. We don’t intentionally mean to offend just for the sake of being offensive.

But it is odd, isn’t it? Today it seems like so many more people take offense so easily while purposely not wanting to be accountable or responsible for whatever they unconsciously post on social media. Some revel in the abuse. The double standard, in the context of what only seems to apply to traditional media, offends me.

Yes, I realize within the realm of the worldwide my personal worries are pitifully small. I hope my offenses to others are likewise small. Thankfully, most people extend patience toward me rather than the handful who express offense to me. But it’s hard not to take the criticism personally. While trying to develop a healthy thick skin, I’m trying not to be thick-headed. Offenses voiced against me apply pressure on our resources, and the stress from sleep-marred nights takes its toll as I grow old.

I do hope you don’t take offense by me sharing these thoughts with you. Please note I’m not whining about tariffs which are raising prices on our aluminum press plates, tariffs on newsprint delivered to us from Canada, post office delivery failures or more problems which are offensive and depressing to me

…well, not yet.