Remember When People Talked?

Greetings from Poosey.

All I wanted to do was visit. Two old classmates were back in town for a wedding and we’d not seen each other in years. Since I was the local gal they asked me to pick out a restaurant and a time, then we’d meet for a long-awaited catch-up session. Things like this are always a bit scary as you wonder which of you has changed the most in the ensuing years and whether your memories match.

I was the first to arrive and staked out a table in the far corner so we’d not be bothered much by the passing café crowd. My two friends showed up at the appointed time and after a brief session of hugs and hellos we settled down to chat.

“Freida, want to see my granddaughter?”

Has anyone ever said no to a grandmother and lived to tell the tale? “Of course! Show me a picture!”

“Oh, better than that! Watch this video! It’s her first dance recital!” and the gal popped out her phone. I sat there trying to smile and throw in things like, “Oh, that’s sweet!” and “How adorable!” when in fact all I could see was the shaky camerawork of a proud grandmother depicting forty or so tiny dancers on a three-inch screen. Our salads had arrived but I didn’t have the nerve to stop the showing of Little Jessica dancing with a small army of first graders while Taylor Swift screamed, “Shake it Off!” in the background. I told my old friend that I was delighted and started picking my way through my Cobb salad. “Oh wait, Freida! You’ve got to see this!” It seems as though Little Jessica recently had a birthday party and grandma just happened to have a video. While I watched a screaming mishmash of little girls sing Happy Birthday, my friends ate their salads.

“Isn’t that adorable?” she’d say as I tried to find a polite way to cut my lettuce while watching the screen. Then was when my other old friend piped up with, “Did you see that YouTube thing about the cat and the hot sauce?” I truthfully said that somehow this bit of vital information had slipped my notice. “Here!” she said. “I’ll pull it up on my phone!” Which she did… cat, sauce and all.

Somewhere in the middle of my turkey horseshoe the ladies began comparing Pinterest posts on spring decorating. I sat there trying to maneuver the excess cheese off to the side of my plate and making a mental list of who not to invite to lunch next week. By the time we’d finished our cold meal the ladies had shared their favorite tweets, called up several items they’d bought on Amazon, and put in a bid for house slippers on Ebay. After about 45 minutes one of the gals turned to me and said, “So, Freida …how have you been?” Delighted at this first bit of real conversation I began to tell her what I’d been doing in the 30 years since we’d seen each other, casually mentioning that we’d moved off the farm and into town. The gal’s face lit up. “Really! Have you seen that online video about dogs that move to town?” Sinner that I was, I said I had not, and of course she spent a few minutes searching so I could watch it. I was less than fascinated.

Remember when people talked? Eyeball to eyeball? Remember when you could eat a meal without someone checking something on her phone? Remember when we were human?

Our local college once offered a course in “Meaningful Conversation” and when they announced the class there was a joint giggle in our community, wondering what could possibly learned about something that’s second nature to everyone. Too bad. I was helping our youth minister take a group of kids to an amusement park last summer when we traveled through a stretch of Missouri without phone service. Suddenly every electronic device in the car went dead and the kids looked up as if someone had just taken them off life support. For over twenty minutes they had to talk to each other …face to face …eye to eye …person to person. I won’t say this was a life-changing moment for the kids, but it was sweet to watch them struggle a bit.

If my two lady friends decide to get together in the next few years, I may pass. I’ll tell them to just send me a video.

You ever ‘round Poosey, stop by. We may not answer the door but you’ll enjoy the trip.