Give Thanks for All Things

Literally minutes after finishing up pages to send to the imagesetter and before the press actually got rolling on last week’s edition, priorities changed. We were physically stunned by the news. While standing in confusion and cradled in a hurting grandmother’s arms, a telephone call confirmed the unthinkable. My 2-year-old grandson, Tucker, would be in surgery within hours to remove a brain tumor at Children’s Mercy Hospital.

This edition marks the end of the first week of little Tucker’s new world. It has been a week marked by many tense hours of feeling totally useless and a second surgery, and climaxed yesterday by unbelievable relief. At 4:35 yesterday, another single word marked the end of this first chapter. My son, the father whose been a rock during all the emotional chaos, sent the text message we so much wanted to hear: “BENIGN.”

This morning I sit here thinking how selfish I am. During this past week I’ve spent hours reflecting on the perils that other families face. Countless examples filed past us in that wonderful hospital built specifically for little ones, down hallways where nobody wants to go. There are so many. There are so few times I stopped to think, much less to lend support to those in such real need.

I compared my life’s work to a custodian’s, who took time to gently smile while pointing out the direction to the PICU waiting room. And to the young mothers who have the immense capacity of doubling as hospital nurses – on the job 24-7, loving their own as well as yours in need. And to the one doctor unwilling to explain away little Tucker’s symptoms with the excuses that others were using, who pushed and persisted until tests confirmed the unthinkable.

I find my own life’s work lacking.

This past week I spent many hours contemplating others. I suspect this was a defensive ploy, to keep sanity. But I am sad to admit how slow I was to think outside my own selfish funk. My whole world was just about Tucker until I learned that Tucker’s neurosurgeon was the same man that has treated Patrick McBroom in his battle against the odds. Then I thought long about little Libby Wilson (Jason and Abbey Wilson’s daughter), a survivor for several years now with the sweetest smile …just like her mother’s.

So many have gone before, down this dark road. What gives me the right to write only about Tucker?

For days I sat in waiting room or near the hospital bed with a room full of family yet often feeling quite alone. Many there were constantly texting others by using the smart phones; I realized once again that to have friends you must be a friend. And, really, all this new technology is just a convenience to get even better at that.

Some have timidly asked whether I read Facebook. I don’t. But perhaps I should.

As I drove to the office this morning, I had no idea exactly what to put into words for this space today. I’m drained. I wasn’t going to try write anything, embarrass myself by writing some meaningless jibberish. I figured you’d understand.

Then Liz, my wife, shared a Facebook entry that my other son, Brett, had posted. It was written last night before “BENIGN” was celebrated, which to me makes this all the more worth reading:

“Today I am so thankful for this little guy. My nephew, Tucker (Scott and Michelle Wilkinson’s son), was diagnosed with a brain tumor Tuesday night. During emergency surgery Wednesday morning, doctors were able to completely remove the tumor. Tucker is not in the clear, follow-up MRIs and biopsies will determine if the tumor was cancerous and whether additional surgery and/or chemo is required. Please pray for Tucker as he faces tough challenges ahead.

In many ways, I’m more thankful this day than any other I’ve experienced.

I’m thankful for loving parents. Scott and Michelle have been amazing through this ordeal. Positive, loving, and selfless. What an example of how to love your kids.

I’m thankful for my family. I’m so proud that my family genuinely loves each other. We love Tucker as if he were our own kid. We support each other through hard times, thick and thin.

I’m thankful for nurses and doctors. We take for granted the sacrifice these people make. Thank you for your dedication, working on holidays.

I’m thankful that prayer works. No, this doesn’t mean God will grant whatever you request like a genie. It’s in God’s hands whether Tucker will be healed. But prayer gives you strength and wisdom to accept God’s bigger plan. God works ALL things for his good, even when we can’t comprehend (Romans 8:28).

Count your blessings, name them one by one! Give thanks for all things.”