The Poosey Digest: Remembering graduation…or not

Greetings from the Ridge.

The only thing I can remember about my graduation is the way my cotton commencement gown stuck to the back of my sweaty legs when I rose to get my diploma. Then when I turned my head for mom’s camera the tassels slapped across my moist forehead and remained there in what resembled a map of the tributaries of the Missouri River.

I’m sure that something else happened. Flowers, speeches, gifts, and photographs. Oh yes… I recall my high school math teacher moving down the line of graduates, shaking each hand and saying, "I do this in case one of you amount to something some day." I’m still not sure if her wish came true.

Since that hot night long ago I’ve had the occasion to speak to graduating classes and my problem is always the same… Did anyone come here tonight to hear me? And the answer is always… No, they came to get a diploma or watch someone else get a diploma. You’re the thing they must simply endure to get the procedure over and done. Sort of like a root canal with a microphone or a dental exam with a party afterwards.

As a result I’ve tried to keep them short and pithy. Actually, I use the word "pithy." It not only teaches the grads a new vocabulary word but it makes them think you’ve just said something obscene.

After all, these kids have just endured 13 or so years of advice and it’s easy to become sated with too much of even a good thing. And of course the graduates of 2010 can barely endure any message that can’t fit into the space of a text-messaging screen. Long sentences and ideas requiring any sort of development will cause them to push the mental "delete" button. So, if I was to address a group of today’s graduates I’d try to boil it down to a series of single words. If they wanted more information they could Google it.

"GIVE." (Sorry, but as much fun as "taking" may seem, the only people in life who are going to be happy are those who’ve sought and found out how to give. Look around your family Christmas table. Grandpa’s stomach is rumbling, the kids are squirming, the sister-in-law is wondering how long this is going to take, and Mom is the happiest one in the room. Why? Because she’s on her feet, she’s moving, she’s serving, she’s giving. You’ve heard a great deal over the past few years of your education on how to make a living… on how to best receive. I hope that someone along the way has taught you that not of whit of this will make you very happy. Learn how to give of yourself and then get set for a life of joy.)

"ADAPT." (I thought my young world changed quickly, but the speed at which I had to adjust doesn’t compare to the velocity of fine-tuning that you’ll have to make. The trick is not getting stuck in your routine simply because you’ve always done it this way. Think you’re interested in business? Great. Get ready for a career in education. Always had an affinity for math? Good for you… you may only use the discipline that math teaches and never use the actual skill a day in your life. During the Depression my grandma’s neighbors lamented their lack of sweets since sugar was so hard to come buy. Grandma went out and bought bees. The neighbors whined. Grandma adapted.)

"CALM DOWN." (Whenever changes occur there will be those who proclaim their coming as the end of the world. So far they’ve all been wrong. They’ve studied why some people do well in a train or plane accident and why some act like second-string actors in a disaster movie. The difference in the two groups has nothing to do with their ability to open emergency doors or inflate life rafts. It simply comes down to keeping your head on straight and taking things one task at a time.)

"FOCUS." (No matter what you may think of your skills at multi-tasking, research shows that they simply don’t exist. You’re fooling yourself if you think you can do two things simultaneously and well. But I’m not speaking about your ability to cruise the Internet while you write an email. When this thing we call "life" is over the only tasks that you’ll be known for are those you’ve accomplished for your family and the others you love. Any time your job, your dreams, or your goals take precedence over your family then your train just went off the track, Bubba. Anyone can do those things. Focus on those things that only you can do, that only you must do.)

There… that was painless… even pithy.

You ever in Poosey, stop by. We may not answer the door but you’ll enjoy the trip.