Missouriana

by Jack Stapleton, Jr.

*It’s somewhat comforting to realize that if you have survived the holiday season up to this point, your chance of living a long life is very good.

*Judging from K-mart’s sales records for this year’s holiday season, it seems Santa did most of his gift shopping at Wal-Mart.

* The old saying about sons emulating their fathers must be true: George W’s budget deficit next year will be close to the last one of his Dad’s.

*It’s difficult to realize that the most distressing problem in Washington at this time only a few years ago was a young girl named Monica.

*Missourians will know their state is really in dire financial straits when officials decide to rent the governor’s mansion to weekend tourists.

*An old-timer is anyone who can remember when the Missouri Highway Department was the king of all state agencies instead of the joker.

*It’s hard to realize that when Trent Lott was a young boy, relatives were proud of his speaking ability.