Quips by Jack Stapleton, Jr.


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Quips by Jack Stapleton, Jr.

*Atty. Gen. Ashcroft wants to fingerprint some foreign visitors arriving in the U.S., raising the question of whether airports will now offer overnight sleeping rates for everyone.

*The City of St. Louis appears to be the only municipality in Missouri that survives on federal and state grants, charitable gifts and faulty parking meters.

*One characteristic of Missouri’s spring weather this year is that if you wanted rain, there was virtually no delay between your request and the delivery time.

*President Bush says agencies like the FBI and CIA aren’t “communicating properly” or to give a clearer example: like the White House and Congress.

*More than 700,000 British turn out to celebrate the 50 years of Queen Elizabeth’s reign without anyone noticing she was wearing the same clothes she wore back then.

*The Air Force suspends a colonel who called President Bush “a joke,” a dumb remark that only qualifies the officer for a lifetime membership in the Democratic Party.

*Estimates place white collar crime costs at $300 billion which ought to be enough to wash the ring out.