Missouriana

Quips by Jack Stapleton, Jr.

*Missouri legislators continue to search for ways to fund existing programs by reducing money for less-favored projects. It’s a process known as robbing Peter to pay Paul.

*This is the first time in years that the Winter of Our Discontent has carried over into April, making in the Spring of Our Discomfort.

*We hope postage stamps featuring favorite scenes from each of the 50 states won’t feature a Missouri legislator posing as a street corner beggar.

*Perhaps the qualification to run for a stat public office should include the requirement that the candidate be prepared to deal with serious budget shortages.

*A study finds that owners of the St. Louis Cardinals really can’t afford to build a new stadium but opponents claim it’s only a ruse to make them appear like the rest of us.

*In an effort to find ways to improve highways, state officials promise to “hit the road.” Judging from the roads’ disrepair, it seems someone has beat them to it.

*An old-timer is someone who remembers when George W. promised not to worry much about the Middle East crisis.