Missouriana

Quips by Jack Stapleton, Jr.

*Some Missouri legislators are reluctant to use the state’s Rainy Day Fund to maintain services, forgetting it’s not called the Plenty of Revenue Fund.

*The Academy Award for best movie went to the story of a psychiatric patient who suffered reality distortion, an illness frequently experienced by politicians.

*Skeptics express doubt the new campaign reform law will clean up politics, while partisans express fear the skeptics are wrong.

*A revenue-starved Missouri budget may leave the state’s liquor control agents without operating funds, denying them the much-anticipated happy hour.

*America may be the globe’s melting pot, but with two million foreign visitors with expired visas in our midst, it would be more accurate to say we’re the world’s boiling pot.

*The only good thing to emerge from investigations of St. Louis election fraud is the traditional final conclusion declaring how bad things are.

*Government workers claim they’re underpaid and citizens claim they’re being taxed down to their underwear.