by Jack Stapleton, Jr.


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by Jack Stapleton, Jr.

* Pentagon officials still have no solution on how to track down terrorists hiding in Afghanistan. How about sending them notices they’ve just won the Powerball sweepstakes?

* City officials took up a collection to extend spotlighting of the St. Louis Arch, a plan that shortened the light-time to 30 seconds.

* A loser is the fellow who bet a bundle on Gore beating Bush and then borrowed money to buy a new car just before the no-interest deals started.

* If you’re still having indigestion after that big Thanksgiving meal, you need to consult a doctor before insisting you wife enroll in a cooking class.

* Mark McGuire announced he wouldn’t play out the years left on his contract just before signing up for a lifetime one with his Illinois girlfriend.

* Wouldn’t it be appropriate for the government to fund a study to determine why residents in warm areas feel morally superior to those with 10 inches of snow?

* MoDOT says it needs another $1 billion a year for better roads. Couldn’t half a billion make them half decent?