by Freida Marie Crump
Greetin’s from the Ridge.
FREIDA: Finally! You know how long I’ve been on hold to Iraq?
SADDAM: Who is this? This is high-security phone line!
FREIDA: I appreciate that, ‘cause I hate snoops.
SADDAM: You sound American!
FREIDA: Amen and pass the Pop Tarts! Freida Marie Crump, most fascinatin’ housewife in Coonridge USA.
SADDAM: A housewife? A mere woman housewife!
FREIDA: Look Saddam, do